Monday, September 26, 2011

Thank You


Thank you, to all of you who have left me a comment or sent an email and to everyone who has kept my family in their thoughts and prayers with the passing of my Mother-In-Law.
They have all been greatly accepted with open hearts.

She and I didn't always see eye to eye.
(and both of us could be called bull-headed)

When the Farmboy and I were dating, his mother and I didn't like each other at all.
She thought I wasn't good enough for her son.
I thought she was just a mean, old woman with a chip on her shoulder.

After she lost her husband, the Farmboy and I decided she should come live with us.
It took a lot of adjusting for both her and me.

Then one day we blew up on each other.
It was nasty.
So nasty it had the Farmboy tip-toeing backwards from the room so as not to be pulled into the middle of it.
It ended with me calling her a "crazy, old lady" and her calling me a "crazy bitch."
Then we both burst into laughter and tears and hugged.

The ice had melted.
She finally respected me.

She was an incredibly strong woman.
Independent.  Hard working.  As giving as a person can be.

One day when I was whining about something or other that she had done to irritate me, my father looked at me and said,
"You listen to her.  She's lived a long, hard life and is full of wisdom because of it."
I couldn't see it at the time.
But this last year I've spent with her, I've seen it as clear as day.  It may not have always been within her words, but it was definitely within her actions.

She raised two amazing boys and loved them more than anything.
And she gave me an unexpected gift when she died.
She brought my Sister-In-Law and I closer together.
Unexpected because we were already so close, we didn't think we could get any closer.

I used to joke with her that she wasn't allowed to die on my watch.
She would cackle and tell me she most definitely would.
I'm sure she thought she got the last word in, because that is exactly what she did.

But by now she probably knows she was wrong.
I feel more than honored to have been by her side when she left us.
Honored to have seen her off on her next journey, letting her know how much we all love her.

As I sit here now and write this, I can hear her fussing at me,
"Stop your crying over me, Weezie, and go make something pretty!"

So that's what I'm going to do.







15 comments:

Heather Ales said...

Oh Alisa!!! I didn't know she had passed, I am SO sorry. I figured something was up, but didn't know. I feel terrible that I wasn't able to send my condolences.

This is a beautiful post, and I love the insight you shared.

Sending love and prayers!

Robin Thomas said...

Oh gee Alisa,

Thiss took my breath away.

I am so glad you were there for her

Charlene said...

Alisa what a great post!!! I had no idea what you were going through but, I LOVE the story of how 2 who thought they didn't like each other became soooooooo very close. HEALING HUGS SENT YOUR WAY! Can't wait to see your pretty. Charlene

Jillayne said...

This post and the last are two of the most beautiful I have ever read....
There are not many people outside of our family who can take all we have, can hear the hard stuff, and can laugh with us at the end of a rant. You were lucky you found that together, she was lucky she recognized who you were. Wonderful memories...

Tina said...

What a beautiful post Alisa - so thoughing.
Sending lots of thought, prayers and hugs your way.
xo Tina

Dorthe said...

Dear Alisa-such a beautiful post,
life with its downs and ups, --you was brave to accept your mil, living together with you- and got a beautiful gift, from doing it- love in return, for both of you.
Hugs,Dorthe

Unknown said...

I'm so sorry for your loss Alisa! What a touching post!!!

Hugs!
Sandy

kandeland said...

what a very beautiful post Alisa. it's amazing how life works out, and how things happen for a reason. wishing you and your family peace through your memories of her...xo

Amanda said...

It bought tears to my eyes, so human and touching.

Margaret said...

Beautiful tribute to your MIL ALisa. My thoughts are with you and yours at this time Mx

Suz said...

Dear Alisa,
I am so sorry to read this. I had no idea. This is so full of true emotions. I love the "realness" of who you are.

I loved the post before this one, too. that is undoubtedly one of my favorite writings about dying.

Hugs and prayers,
Suz

Diane Langness said...

I'm so sorry to hear of your loss. I enjoyed reading about your mother-in-law. I can tell you were a wonderful daughter-in-law. She was blessed to have you--and you her.
Hugs,

Tiedupmemories said...

Alisa,
It's been awhile and what a memorable post. Thinking of you. My condolences to you and your family. Your floral photos are simply gorgeous! Very inspiring.
Tracy

Anonymous said...

Wow, Alisa, this is one of the most poignant eulogies I have ever read. Beautiful.

God bless!
Diane

Debe said...

Hugs and prayers to all of you. Time passes and things change, some good, some bad, always unexpected...I for one never thought you were a c... b... but what do I know? :<)
Hard thing...